Well, I did NOT see this coming. So I went this past Friday for the PRP (platelet rich plasma) injections for patellar tendonosis (and a partial patellar tendon tear on the left side). I entered all excited and ready. Earlier that week I prepared to be out of commission for the weekend: The Mrs. got me food, I had online poker loaded up and my laptop was charged ready to get some sedentary work done. The doctor called me in and prepped me on what was going to happen. Considering I am a licensed physical therapist and had done my homework and research on the protocols for PRP injections, I knee what was too happen anyway. Next, his assistant laid me on the table and had my right arm slightly hanging off the table. The doctor strapped a tourniquet around my bicep and gave my arm a slight slap to encourage the veins to show. Well, no veins showed. The doctor stated “Anatomically speaking, the vein should be here. Perhaps your veins are just genetically deep”. He jabbed in with the needle, and no blood came. Then, the doctor said “Let’s try more distally (farther away from your body)”. He punctured the skin, hit the vein annnnnd nothing. I overheard him mumble “Well, this is unusual”. Now that isn’t something you want to hear! Shortly after, he said to me, “Let’s try the other arm”. So, I quickly flipped aorund and we tried the same two locations with the same amount of success = none. Shortly after this next strikeout he told me “Lets try more towards your ankle, there is a large vein that runs towards the front of your shin that we can access”. At that point, I was up for anything. So, the needle is inserted, wiggled around (which was NOT fun by the way) annnnd…nothing. Now I am starting to get a little nervous. Is it me? Is in the doctor? Am I superhuman (that would be pretty cool)? I can see the doctor’s frustration. “Alright, Joe, I have one last resort that I won’t do unless I absolutely have too. I’m going for your neck”. My response, “…What?”. He instructed me to turn my head to the left and clench my teeth. He examined my neck for a vein. Next, I heard him say “You’ve got to be kidding me! Joe, I can’t even find what I am looking for in your neck. By any chance are you allergic to sunlight?” Hahaha, I just started laughing. “No, Doc, I am not a vampire…although I hate garlic…and splinters kill me (with annoyance). All in all, he was able to perform the PRP secondary to me not being able to draw blood. I have to return (with a phlebotomist present) to go for my 2nd attempt. Wish me luck.

“Muscles in the bank”

Dr. JEST